Anger: A Sense of Belonging and Individualisation

by Jon R G Turner and Troya G N Turner

This article is reproduced with kind permission from the authors from the International Society for Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Medicine (ISPPM) Congress “Times of Transition: Sense for Belonging and Individuality” which took place on 29^th and 30^th of October, 2010 at Alanus Highschool, Alter, DE near Bonn.

The keynote speaker was Dr. Wayne A. Guthrie who said:

The world, of which you are a part today, is torn asunder because of ideological and religious belief. Few upon the planet today, though they espouse great wisdom and a belief, and profess to have a deep anchor in spiritual understanding, are truly in touch with the depth of their emotions. Thus, you have one part of the world polarized against the other because many fear or fail to understand what it is that is occurring within the human being.

Dr. Guthrie identifies a core challenge facing humanity. In an age of change, an age when humanity is making a tremendous leap in evolution and development of consciousness as well as technology, humanity is being deluged with a thunderous emotional pattern – Anger. Common usage defines anger as a human emotion. In our research, Whole-Self Psychology has discovered other dimensions as well and offers some optional ideas. For example, anger is a conditioned reflex I trigger when something about myself is being reflected to me, in the situation, which I do not want to admit.

Belonging

Before discussing how anger seems to be diminishingly addicting humanity let us define the key motivators in our title, first – Belonging. Belonging can deal with a sense of connectedness with any other people. What usually comes to mind is family roots. My roots help me to identify myself through the branches of the tree of life from which I am the fruit. These roots have for several thousands of years been grouped through race, nation state, country. Another scale of belonging manifests in community. In Conscious Evolution: The Dance of Intuition and Intellect Sheldon and Barbara Smith Stoff trace community back to:

Many animals function best in herds or packs. We notice dogs, elephants, bees, wolves,          primates and so many other species form communities. Communities are a result of cohesion, strength and growth. At this time of planetary crisis, it becomes ever more imperative that we create a positive vision for the future. Communities can and should become our basic social unit. Dialogue is a basis for community and is a sustainer for us all.

Individuation

Individuation has been described extensively by Carl Gustav Jung as the gradual integration and unification of the self through the resolution of successive layers of psychological conflict. Defined by the American Heritage Dictionary, individuation is the act or process of individuating, especially the process by which social individuals become differentiated one from the other. And so, we are back to belonging and community.

The Smokescreen of Anger

Whole-Self discovered that anger is not just an innate emotion. Whole-Self Psychology defines anger as a smoke screen, a firewall I hide behind when something is being reflected in me about myself that I do not want to admit. Troya discovered that a smoker can use the smokescreen to hide a secret and introduced that model very effectively in Whole-Self Psychology sessions to help people stop smoking by asking the Whole-Self of the person what secret was there. Actually, we found that in a fiery emotional outburst, anger may not actually be the problem. Anger could be seen as a behavior – even a learned behavior. Since it is a smokescreen and firewall, anger simply may be a cover-up of several layers of emotions culminating in three main patterns I do not want to admit feeling helpless, hopeless and powerless because those patterns exclude me from belonging. The singular promise of Presidential Candidate Barack Obama was the promise of hope that America could change if Americans could change.

In a vision of hope, anticipating the birth of a new movement of community in the USA, the Stoffs wrote:

The vision of hope that is possible today is not based on a unitary leader, but rather a call from a large group of seekers in convergence, not content to see humanness trashed in sea of violence, greed and domination. This vision will not accept a society where many are manipulated by a few and where inequity is the order of the day. If we have the courage to look closely at events in our time, there will be the realization that humans can indeed do better – that harmony and justice can emerge as the tenor of the day.

Community Synergizes to Action

When individuals unite their beliefs in a common cause their action can synergize. R. Buckminster Fuller discovered that “Synergy means behavior of the whole system unpredicted by the behavior of their parts taken separately”. Another way to define synergy is that the total energy is greater than just the sum of its parts. According to the website Answers.com the phrase “It Takes a Village to Raise a Child” is attributed to an old African proverb. In January 1996 publisher Simon and Schuster released Hillary Rodham-Clinton’s book It Takes a Village: And Other Lessons Children Teach Us in which then USA First Lady Hillary espoused more the expansion of government than any true wisdom or insight into the nurturing of children”. And the expansion of government and a ballooning debt in the trillions of dollars passed on to their children and grandchildren has sparked and synergized individual citizens into a political community which created a sum of anger greater than the anger of individual citizens. In the USA, it is acknowledged that the Tea Party Movement was hypothetically conceived and born as a community suffused with anger. While some in the world may not know about America’s angry – political ‘non-party’ as it likes to call itself, it is possible to use the Tea Party Movement as an example of manipulating the masses through anger.

The Tea Party Movement USA Born of Anger

The Tea Party Movement was founded to replicate the angry action of Colonist in Boston, Massachusetts, USA revolting against a tea tax imposed by the British Crown over 250 years ago. The Colonists dressed in the guise of Native Americans boarded a British merchant ship and threw the cargo of ‘royal taxed tea’ into Boston Harbor. In the 21^st Century, emotionally synergized anger brought about the conception and development of the Tea Party. Begun over a year before the November 2010 mid-term election in the USA, its founding and development is a potent example of the smokescreen of anger. What is the truth of its conception?

Roots of the Tea Party Movement

In alignment with the Stoffs visions of hope, The Tea Party Movement is purported to have begun as a grassroots, leaderless movement to represent honest, decent, concerned citizen’s protesting against what was believed to be ‘too big government’ and ‘too high government debt’. To some in the Tea Party, the vision of reasoned hope President Barak Obama promised was a distraction from action. In alignment with our theme title, these were Americans who simply wanted to belong – to have their voices heard. Basic themes of the Tea-partyers touch on the mythic. They decry that big government was overtaxing them and that citizens needed to ‘take back America’. In fact, taxes were significantly lower than in the past and who were they going to take America back from? The true fact is that as in so many European countries debt is the blade hanging over heads their children and grandchildren. This is a basic fear.

Words are tools of communication and can be used to empower or diminish the speaker. Early in its incarnation extremist fractured any vision of hope, for example, by demanding to be heard yet not allowing any reasonable or rational public discussion of health insurance issues. Sincerely, honest citizens often fell prey to angry, often questionable, untrue, even hateful rhetoric on right wing extremist radio and television against their government and particularly President Barak Obama. They blamed President Obama for everything they angrily disputed against even those circumstances which he had inherited from G.W. Bush of which Obama had no responsibility for creating.

The Tea Party Billionaires

As mentioned above, in a political myth, using populist anger as its banner, the Tea Party Movement is alleged to have its conception as a leaderless self-creating community structure of right-minded citizens. In actuality, the truth is that the Tea Party Movement was lavishly funded by the extreme political right wing rich of the Republican Party. Here is an extended quote from Columnist Frank Rich in a New York Times op-ed article revealing the source of the Tea Party Movement financial resources:

There’s just one element missing from these snapshots of America’s ostensibly spontaneous and leaderless populist uprising: the sugar daddies who are bankrolling it, and have been doing so since well before the “death panel” warm-up acts of last summer. (Note: Sarah Palin and others stoked fear in the elderly populous that President Obama’s health care system would set up ‘death panels’ to determine which elderly would receive health care or which would be allowed to die. While being an outright lie it was repeated over and over again.) Three heavy hitters rule. You’ve heard of one of them, Rupert Murdoch. The other two, the brothers David and Charles Koch (pronounced Coke), are even richer, with a combined wealth exceeded only by that of Bill Gates and Warren Buffet among Americans. The Kochs surely match the in-kind donations the Tea Party receives in free promotion 24/7 from Murdoch’s Fox News, where both Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin are on the payroll.

Like I said, the Tea Party has less to do with a grassroots political movement and more to do with power and money. The fat cats financing this “movement” are only too happy to take advantage of those misinformed, misdirected and sometimes intolerant individuals that attend rallies and protests.                                

The Kochs were shoved unwillingly into the spotlight by the most comprehensive journalistic portrait of them yet, written by Jane Mayer of The New Yorker Magazine. Her article caused a stir among those in Manhattan’s liberal elite who didn’t know that David Koch, widely celebrated for his cultural philanthropy, is not merely another rich conservative Republican but the founder of the Americans for Prosperity Foundation, which, as Mayer writes with some understatement, “has worked closely with the Tea Party since the movement’s inception.”

The other major sponsor of the Tea Party movement is Dick Armey’s FreedomWorks…under its original name, Citizens for a Sound Economy, FreedomWorks received $12 million of its own from Koch family foundations.                                                        

Conceived in Anger

The Tea Party became co-opted by angry lies and untruths about President Barack Obama. Brainwashing repetition of slogans and insulting signs reminiscent of totalitarian mass demonstrations of the 20^th Century which had led Europe into two World Wars seduced many people. As an example, a fringe group called ‘Birthers’ continue to deny that President Obama was born in the USA and is therefore ineligible to be President. Misdirection and outright untruths by charismatic, manipulative individuals on right leaning radio and TV especially Fox television moved the masses to anger against President Obama and his programs – programs which in fact, had begun to reverse disastrous policies of the previous George W. Bush administration. Obama policies actually pulled the USA back from the brink of an economic depression. They saved the American car manufacturing industry now in profit for the first time in years. He stood up to the banks for unscrupulous greed and actually created a significant profit for America.

When President Obama defied the health insurance industry and brought healthcare to 30 million uninsured Americans his program was irrationally and angrily denounced as ‘Obamacare’ – a ‘Socialist Virus’ in America. Even well after the 2010 midterm elections, extremist politicians declare that the American people, as though they are the vast majority of Americans, are against ‘Obamacare’. The truth is that there is only one point difference in an equally divided electorate (48%) against (47%) for Universal Healthcare. And even more interesting is that in surveys, even those who say they are opposed to Obamacare are in agreement with the specific health supporting provisions of the law. Erstwhile possible 2012 Presidential Candidate Sarah Palin in speeches before fundamentalist anti-abortion groups across the American Midwest continually declares that Obamacare will pay for abortions – an outright lie she keeps repeating to stir religious anti-abortionists to anger against Obamacare.

A Conundrum of Prejudice

It may be difficult for many Americans to admit, but all the smokescreen of anger and rage against President Obama’s vision could be exposing a core of racist virus still infecting American culture after some 200 years of outlawing African slavery. The conundrum that is almost impossible to reconcile is that while his policies which have saved the USA from a staggering depression are decried, Obama’s personal approval ratings are in the high 70%. Perhaps this can be understood from our theme about belonging. The seeming contradiction could revolve around belonging and not belonging, with white skin and other shades of skin color. The disastrous decline in the middle class has accented a growing divide between the 1% rich and the poor. Even the white population is now joining the ranks of the up till now needy tan and brown and black Americans. Again, an interesting truth about America is that within decades the population of white skinned Americans will be overshadowed by other shades of skin color – Latinos, African Americans and Asians.

In expanding their vision of hope for the future of community without prejudice not just for the USA but for the whole world, the Stoffs foresee:

We now have an evolutionary concept of community that far surpasses the bonds of exclusive self-interest. At heart, our concept of ‘who we are’ has grown and expanded to engulf the stars and the nebula as well as the atoms and the dust particles at our feet. The very concept of our community citizenship is evolving accordingly and our actions must keep up with this process of maturation. The evolution of local community will lead to national and international community and then will inevitably lead to a living understanding of our universal connectedness.

Finally, perhaps the most concerning impetus of the Tea Party Movement in the USA 2010 midterm election was putting forward for public office some faintly luminous fanatical personalities who were simply ignorant, as though public office was the reward for winning a personality reality TV show. During the 2010 mid-term election campaign former USA President Bill Clinton cited a survey which summed up the result of mass displays of people trapped in anger, “When people act out anger, 86 percent of the time they make mistakes in their actions.” The overwhelming shift of over 60 House seats from Democrats to Republicans who were originally responsible for the economic crisis during the G.W Bush administration seems to bear out the truth of his statement.

Is Anger Fashionable?

Volatile Tea Party demonstrations of anger trigger adrenaline in participants, the most addictive substance to the human body. So, the more people set up their smokescreen of anger in non-productive ways, without rational resolution, the more addicted they become to their adrenaline. In France, in that 2010 November of discontent, demonstrations of anger raged against President Sarkosy much beyond his law raising the pension age to 62. Noisy public protest demonstrations were instigated by Labor Unions in France and Greece where population’s angry behaviors – street marches – acting out cries against feeling helpless, hopeless and powerless to save economic gains. In that same month of November, university students in London stormed the Conservative Party’s headquarters in angry revolt against its raising tuitions from $5,000 to $15,000 a year. Students also rose up in anger in Italy. In all cases, citizens were vocalizing and behaving with anger because beneath a plethora of fearful inner emotional patterns they were feeling helpless, hopeless and powerless. Anger has become mass media mode of expression instead of expressing true, authentic positions and the emotions they generate. Anger has become fashionable.

The Racket of Anger

For decades when there was a death, some emotive therapies provoked the survivor to feel angry and lash out verbally or even physically with pillows and bats against the dead person. Kelduyn R. Garland, PhD, explains that in Transactional Analysis:

This is called a RACKET. With a RACKET, the anger is not authentic or real, but a ruse, a red herring ‘smoke screen’ to avoid feeling the true, authentic emotions a person is experiencing. It is a substitute to avoid feeling other more vulnerable emotions such as fear or sorrow. The characteristics and dynamics of a RACKET that Whole-Self Psychology is describing, keeps a person unresolved and stuck. It does not set them free to go on living, as occurs when someone deals with true authentic feelings and emotions (i.e.: you know the truth and the truth sets you free.)

Often when people are grieving the death of a loved one, they will ‘get stuck’ in the anger phase of the grieving process and do not progress into experiencing the fears, sorrows helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness they also feel about their loss, which needs to happen for them to complete their grieving process. So firstly, the survivor is not just feeling anger but many other emotions which she or he is not wanting to feel, and therefore cover up with a pseudo feeling of anger – cover up with the behavior of anger. In the first person, I understand what I am actually feeling underneath the anger – the firewall. I explode to cover up my sadness, disappointment, frustration, fear, helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness. Secondly, the dead person, not being able to defend her or himself, the behavior of anger is unresolved anger. Even years later, after Racket acting out, when asked to remember the death, all the emotions of the loss, sadness, pain, etc beneath the anger are still there. The key to healing these disparate emotions is to recognize and to understand what, in the first person, I was actually feeling. There does not have to be RACKET anger in the world if I fully understand the situation.

A Sidebar of Anger is Sexual Discrimination

As we have seen mass protests can cross easily from “big green monster” anger into intolerance then hatred, racism, bullying and violence. So, many mass demonstrations morph into behaviors of anger, even rioting and killings suspended on the religious limbs of the great oak of life called god. Hatred, bullying and violence against sexual orientation could be a solidified adjunct of anger. Forty years ago, Whole-Self Psychology in the Whole-Self Prebirth Analysis Matrix© Question #8, (see Appendix) showed that sexual orientation is already locked in before birth. Humanity is not just male and female. In Conscious Evolution, The Stoff’s remind us of “the discourses of Plato’s Symposium where the bisexual principle has been presented as primal”.

Again, in the first person, if I have felt uncomfortable about my relationship or sexual feelings or preferences, that is, intimate, sexual feelings towards others of my own gender, I can recognize that these feelings or patterns are not bad or wrong, sinful, evil or sick as held in various religions. As in so many of aspects of nature, gender identity is just another variant in natural sexual orientations which actually exist in considerable numbers throughout humanity.

Hate Is A Growth Industry

In November 2010, Dr. Phil, TV Psychiatrist, on CNN discussing five children committing suicide after being bullied by conservative religiously or politically oriented students or adults because they were gay, concludes that “Religious beliefs about being gay or lesbian are obsolete”. Genderwise, the simple truth is that humanity is not just polarized male or female but there are varying shades of sexual coloring including bi-sexual to non-sexual. There is so much anger, fear and hatred by righteously religious and political leaders circulating in the spiritual and psychological veins of humanity many media people are hypothesizing that ‘Hate is a growth industry’. In an interview on the BBC World Radio Service with a man named David in Bolivia, David remarked, “When I die, God will not ask me if I was gay. He will ask me if my life was a pleasure!”

The Brain And Anger

Kelduyn R. Garland, from her forthcoming copyrighted book Grief: a Transitional Journey discusses some physical dimensions and dynamics of anger:

There are three primary areas of the human brain, reptilian, mammalian and frontal lobe/neocortex. Reptilian is the part of the brain which deals with survival and elicits a fight, flight or freeze response to the world. The Mammalian part of the brain elicits emotional and nurturing responses for care giving and protection. The Neocortex is the reasoning and problem solving part of the brain that puts the ’brake’ on the reactionary responses of the reptilian brain. When you have a person who is not in touch with themselves, as Guthrie described in the Keynote cited above, these three areas of the brain do not function in harmony and people react from a reptilian survival mode. This is illustrated in the old TV show the Incredible Hulk which, as explained by my nine year son after having watched the show in which the main character is morphed into a green monster when he experiences anger told me that, “When you get angry you turn into a big green monster!”

Whole-Self Psychology knows that under certain conditions and certain situations anger may be an effective, legitimate behavior. Sometimes it can be uniquely productive to appropriately stimulate right action. Garland continues:

When people are aware and in touch with themselves, as mentioned by Guthrie, these three parts of brain function in harmony with each other so that the anger energy becomes a feedback mechanism to mobilize the person to bring back into balance and harmony something (situation/ circumstance/agreement) that has gone awry. When the three parts of the brain function the survival responses of fight, flight or freeze are tempered by the reasoning and problem solving abilities of the neocortex can be of good benefit personally, societally and on a planetary level.

Understanding our biological dimension is important but the key to our reasoning and problem solving abilities lies in the consciousness infusing that biology. The Stoff’s expanding a possible future belonging to our community, project that that consciousness is discovered in the vibration of love infusing the human community:

We hope in our present human condition, for the future, and at a very deep level we understand that the individual who does not share love shrinks as a person and becomes as if dead. Such a person perishes though he still walks the earth. To find the way of spirit requires living in the “divine matrix” by giving and receiving the force of love. This love comes from the spark within and the cosmic force without. Consciousness, our most precious gift also comes from the spark within connected to the spiritual. This love is ours to pass along. It is constantly replenished. This is the great lesson of life. It is our great hope to fulfill our responsibility in the chain of hope and of love. To live in hope is to wish to experience the reality of love, and then to share that love.

When that love inspired by the Stoffs’ vision is lost, hope is lost. And when hope is lost it morphs into hopelessness, along with helpless and powerless. And, when I feel those feelings I do not want to feel, I cover them up with anger. Whole-Self agrees that addressing the anger is necessary but through understanding it must go beneath and not just acting out the behavior of anger feeding into adrenaline addiction.

Anger and Fear

The pattern of the learned behavior of anger being an aspect of fear is found in a personal communication from Barbara Findeisen, former President of the Association of Pre- and Perinatal Psychology and Health. It was in connection with an historic prebirth case which was featured on the Oprah Television program:

The subject on Oprah was actually about a mother and her 20 year old daughter and abortion. Oprah’s people contacted me after receiving a letter from the mother. After an accident, the daughter’s doctor told her that some damage was actually from the womb or birth. The mother had tried in many ways to abort the baby but had never mentioned it to her daughter. Oprah’s people flew them to see me at Pocket Ranch in California where on camera the mother told the full story to her daughter for the first time. I did birth work therapy with the daughter. It was very amazing to see the healing that took place. It was much more about fear than anger.

Anger: A Culture of Fear

Furedi writing about the worldwide Culture of Fear describeshow:

Fear has acquired a powerful cultural vibration and is constantly encouraged by the unprecedented level of suspicion towards the human species that prevails at the beginning of the 21^st Century.

Ultimately, fear is a vibrational emotional pattern of also being helpless, hopeless and powerless which humanity covers over with a behavior of anger. It was amazing that Findeisen’s prebirth pattern event could be televised worldwide. While Barbara writes that ‘it was much more about fear than anger’, we have experienced, in other cases, that there is often some lifelong antagonistic behavior of anger or hatred between a child and mother simply from the child non-consciously ‘knowing’ that mother had even a fleeting thought to abort during pregnancy. At the 9th ISPPM Congress Jerusalem, Israel, a paper was presented showing that even when mother changes the fleeting thought of termination to deep wanting and love, the child is born and lives his or her life in the pattern of mother’s emotional fleeting despair moment. For the unfolding consciousness of the preborn, this flash may be sensed as a threat to its very existence. But, what actually is encoded is a possible vibrational pattern of mother’s fear of being pregnant, or a future burdened with a baby, or subjectively, a fear of being a bad mother. The consciousness of baby is in mother’s consciousness, in her mind and in her emotions, experiencing and being educated by mother’s consciousness. The  fleeting thought of termination could be a shared life threatening instant for both. It is a clear illustration of Brekhman’s model of mother/child communication. Because mother’s feelings which are generated are unbearable, her child has lifelong non-conscious fear, even terror, covered over by anger towards mother. These patterns are not released by acting out a behavior of anger as some therapies would attempt to do, but by, as Findeisen shows, specifically through professionally trained prebirth and birth psychology.

Prebirth Symbiosis

Are these mother’s feelings or my feelings? Whole-Self Psychology, Philosophy and Education hypothesizes that just as each of us is the synthesis of our parent’s genetic coding which gives us our physical characteristics, there is also a synthesis of the charged emotional-mental patterns of our parents from the nine months of their pregnancy. Every human being begins life in symbiosis with her or his mother by being psycho-spiritually, energetically attracted and attached to mother’s mind by her charged ideas and thoughts; and, to her emotional body by sharing her charged feelings and emotions – even before conception.

Symbiotic Communication

Symbiotically, as Grigori Brekhman has shown, there exists a communication system between mother and her unborn child on all levels during pregnancy and at birth. Cracks in the mother/baby symbiosis are widening where mother cannot accept her pregnancy. It begins in pregnancy when she directs thoughts of abortion or termination in her non-conscious communication with her not yet born. An increasing number of women are presenting that they have no feelings of love or acceptance towards their babies; when even at the birth of their babies they were still unable to open those channels of mutual emotional communication or connection with their babies. When that happens their babies are born with those non-feeling patterns. This results in an increase of young people growing up without love, compassion or empathy for themselves and any other person. When mother has repulsion and rejection even death wish towards her baby those are the charged patterns baby is born with. In the anthology Phenomenon of Violence edited by Prof Brekhman and Prof Fedor-Freybergh there is clear evidence of the roots of violence in gestation, birth, infancy and childhood.

Can Baby Be Born Angry?

What about reports of babies being born angry? Prebirth and Whole-Self Psychology have shown, and as Brekhman proved in his mother/baby communication study, the consciousness of preonates being in mother’s consciousness are being educated by mother’s charged mental/emotional experiences. When during pregnancy, mother is feeling helpless, hopeless and powerless and she covers over those feelings with a smokescreen or firewall of anger, and at birth, baby feels helpless, hopeless and powerless, baby has already been educated to react with anger.

What Babies Are Teaching Us About Violence

In David B. Chamberlain’s Presidential Address in September 1995 where he gave voice to the unborn as teachers about violence at the 7th International Congress of the Association for Pre- and Perinatal Psychology and Health (APPPAH), in San Francisco on the theme “Birth and Violence: The Societal Impact.”

Because of their keen awareness and proven learning ability before birth, babies are a major, though generally unacknowledged, source of knowledge about the early origins of violence. Clinical and experimental evidence reveals that babies are exposed to considerable violence in the womb and at birth. Many premature babies live in a veritable “theater of violence”. Babies carry destructive imprints of early rejection and separation. We probe the connections between birth and violence at a time when society seems more and more violent, and more and more people seem genuinely concerned about it. Parents, legislators, criminologists, policemen, theologians, and psychologists are among the millions who are asking why people willfully injure and destroy each other. The result of all this activity is a massive and multiplying literature measured in thousands of articles, books, conferences, and media productions. Nevertheless, the roots of violence in the prenatal/perinatal era are rarely explored.

Disastrous Consequences of Prebirth Anger and Violence

Gouni shared a case in which she visited a mother pregnant with twins in hospital because her sack had broken. The mother told of her anger because her husband’s work had him living in another the country. In the Whole-Self session, the male twin, through the mother, told that because he was feeling so much anger he kicked hard and broke the sack. Having been educated by mother’s anger he lashed out replicating mother’s anger and causing a potential disaster. Prognosis is that because of the loss of amniotic fluid there could be critical problems for the boy’s life and if he should live for possible diminished mental and emotional capacity. There are pregnant populations exposed to disastrous cataclysms all over the world being educated to and igniting the firewall of anger. Baby can be born angry.

A Prebirth Anger Case In Action

Westermann reports in some detail the case of a young man locked in patterns of anger and rage:

The client, Robert, a young man, fresh in his job, presents with aggression against corporate management. A famous company tries to come into a consortium of companies. The managers assign Robert the job of facilitating the corporate merger. From the beginning, Robert feels bad about taking on such a venture. Physically, he senses this feeling in his stomach and in his back. But he ignores these feelings. Robert also presents that he has problems with personal relationships with women as well. And, especially, he has difficulties with his mother. She had inherited between 1 and 2 million Euros which she lost to a con artist. Robert’s girlfriend also disappoints him.

Robert works hard to bring the company into the consortium. Then Robert realizes that the management’s intention to merge is false. It only wants to benefit from publicity. Robert is unable to control the situation. In fact, the management not only does not support him, but blames him for the failure and for all the lost money and effort.

The Whole-Self Psychology approach is used to help Robert to resolve his disastrous situation. With his eyes closed, Sigrid invites Robert to ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings you are feeling.’

Robert:“Anger!”

Sigrid: ‘Feeling that anger, please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience your feelings beneath the anger

Robert: “I feel I am being treated unfairly being at the mercy of the management. I feel powerless.”

Sigrid: Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience your non-conscious belief in that moment.’

Robert: “Business is small minded, without imagination. Everyone in business are prisoners. Itis like a mental sanatorium.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the first time in your life when you have those feelings of anger and powerlessness.’

Robert: “Shortly before I am born I feel good. I am relaxed. Everything is okay. And than I am born and it is cold, much too flamboyant, and there is nothing to eat.” (At that time in Germany, babies were placed in a newborn nursery and only given to mother for feeding every four hours).

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings in the nursery.’

Robert:“Anger!”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings behind the anger.’

Robert: “I am treated unfairly at the mercy of the management – I am powerless.”

Sidrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings you have towards your mother.’

Robert: (answers from his mind): “My mother is a brilliant fairytale-telling mother, but she is not able to bring that fairytale into the world.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience how that makes you feel.’

Robert: (again mental answers) “Your own source is wrong. The source of your life is wrong. Fantasy is wrong. Look what comes out of that?” (mother was not that successful).

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience how that makes you feel.’

Robert: “I have so much to say but no one is listening to me. My heart contracts. I either betray my body or my ideals. My heart is now contracting, my legs are cold and paralyzed.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience how those make you feel.’

Robert:“Anger.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings behind the anger.’

Robert:“Rage.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the feelings behind the rage.’

Robert:“Hopelessness, I will die anyway!”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience were the feelings are located in your body.’

Robert: “In my heart – Like a death-shot.” (His father died of  a heart-attack when he was 40).

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience what your mind is doing now.’

Robert: “My mind stops, halts!”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the condition your emotional body is feeling because of that pain in your heart.’

Robert: “Becoming smaller.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the connection with your spiritual source feeling that pain in your heart.’

Robert: “The source is still there but I have difficulties to connect with it – to get the information that can help me.”

Sigrid: ‘Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the non-conscious belief you have at this moment.’

Robert: “I will pay them back when I am grown up.”

Robert has realized that his anger, rage and need for revenge were actually cloaks – cover-ups for what Whole-Self Psychology calls trigger feelings which are helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness – feelings he did not want to feel. The actual trigger feeling he had all his life was not those diminishing feelings but the good, relaxed feeling he felt before his birth which when he entered his little body with his first breath changed to helpless, hopeless and powerless catalyzed later by a fear of dying of starvation.

Robert was able to acknowledge and heal the patterns from the beginning of this life. He understood that all his life he had created situations of anger which where covering up feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness. He could now face and no longer be at the affect of fear triggered by relaxed feelings. Afterwards, having released the pattern of good, relaxed feelings changing to powerlessness covered up by anger and rage towards his mother – the lifelong, infantile feelings which had controlled his behavior towards her and other women as well, were dissipated. Now that he was safe and relaxed, Robert was able to find a woman, to marry, and, to have a baby. (Before he only had relationships where he was disappointed by the woman). Now he was able to feel good and relaxed without becoming punished afterwards.

Whole-Self PAM Discovers Gender Rejection Trauma

An even more devastating trauma pattern can be the sense of rejection for being the ‘wrong’ sex. Anita, an American mother, single, in her early 60s, presents being melancholic. She feels weary, tired of life, not interested in life and filled with fears and anxieties. Through her Whole-Self Prebirth Analysis Matrix, Anita discovers the core familiar emotional patterns which had became the pillars of her life. She discovers the source of the stark contrasting contradiction between her male and female polarities. Anita discovers that  in the act of intercourse mother feels that while her partner is feeling love and desire towards her as she is gripped in sadness. She feels sad, lonely with a sense of revulsion and anger within herself. Her feelings toward her partner include revulsion and disgusting rejection.

In her Whole-Self PAM, using her creative imagination, Anita senses her father’s sperm is optimistic, adventuresome, excited, happy, creative, full of life, fun. While in stark contradiction her mother’s egg does not want anything as she is overwhelmed with repulsion for life, fear, anxiety and resistance. Continuing her prebirth creative visualization, Anita senses that when mother’s egg sees father’s sperm coming towards her, she is trapped, paralyzed in fear, locked and wants to be left alone. Again, in contrast, her father’s sperm is happy. He says, ‘The goal is there, so let’s go for it’. The feeling is fun.

As mother’s egg is surrounded and engulfed by the hundreds of father’s surviving sperm trying to penetrate into her, she reaffirms that she does not want this to be happening. She rejects everything. The sense is an overwhelming repulsion for life building up and compounding fear, anxiety and resistance. Anita discovers the sensation as if something is going to happen that the egg really does not want to happen. She now experiences that the formation of her female ego is violation! Then comes another discovery. In her Whole-Self PAM, Anita senses her fetal consciousness floating in pleasant peacefulness. This peace is shattered when it is sucked into the wall of the womb. Anita realizes that this anchoring is the source of her lifelong feelings of being trapped, stuck and locked.

Then, Anita discovers the source of her most familiar feelings in life. While most people discover diminishing feelings come from a specific traumatic event during the pregnancy, Anita, as some also have found, learns that there can be a pervasive, continuous state of diminishing reality – what the consciousness believes is real. For Anita’s mother the ongoing situation of being trapped at home is a constant struggle being disappointed and unhappy in her life. She judges herself to be guilty, unaccepted, unable, incapable, powerless, indifferent, apathetic, unrecognized, stupid and inept. While Anita discovers her mother’s trauma, she also discovers the actual source of her own pandemic comes from her own birth – GENDER REJECTION. Devastation sweeps through her when she is revealed to be a girl when ‘it’ was supposed to be a boy. When asked about her life purpose, Anita replies, “I wish I knew! It seems not to be of any purpose, and this pisses me off!” Angry words indeed. After her Whole-Self Prebirth Analysis session, Anita’s perspective on life is significantly enhanced.

In The Case Of A Thought Of Abortion

The important point is that prebirth psychology is able to help a person to realize and understand the physical and emotional circumstances of helplessness, hopelessness and powerless which mother may have been experiencing which motivated mother to consider an abortion. As mentioned above, in cases where there is extreme life-long conflict between a child (even an adult child) and mother, prebirth psychology can help the client to realize that because during gestation a child is symbiotically experiencing and being emotionally educated by mother’s thoughts and emotions, a child non-consciously ‘knows ‘ what mother was even fleetingly considering. In Whole-Self Psychology, we help the child recognize a distinction that the mother did not ‘not want the child’ but because of circumstances did not want a baby, the pattern of anger toward mother can be gently released. Because of gestational symbiosis the child believes that conflicts are its own. Profound healing in the relationship can happen when a child realizes that the conflict patterns where actually mother’s during her pregnancy. It is also noteworthy that should an abortion be mother’s chosen option, the consciousness of the baby does not die or cease to exist but simply moves on to another potential mother who will give her or him the life learning possibilities she or he needs for its consciousness development or evolution.

The Prebirth Source of Intimacy

Trust is a key element in relationships. Where do primary shared beliefs of individuals such as trust or mistrust which permeate a culture come from? In the Whole-Self Prebirth Analysis Matrix a key moment is during sexual communication. Brazilian Psychotherapist Suely Moliterno in her paper Moments Before Conception has shown in Prebirth regression cases that:

The thoughts, feelings and physical sensations experienced by the parents during their sexual relation, will be assimilated by the new born human being as his own. During his life the individual has a tendency to carry on with him all those feelings which will manifest in his present effective sexual relationships.

Prebirth Source of Hatred

So, a most essential element in human relationships is trust. Olga Gouni, in her paper Prebirth Psychology in Action analyzed the consciousness of anger in a number of clients in Cyprus. She especially noted the cultural, universal mistrust in relationships within the Cypriote community. When I was teaching in Limassol, Cyprus in the Summer of 2006, I met a woman who had a son 32 years of age. Meeting me, he mentioned that he could not understand his very strong burning hatred for Turks. Later, I asked his mother what had been happening during her pregnancy. She told me that in 1974, the year of his birth, Turkey had invaded Cyprus. The Cypriote community was deeply traumatized. I asked her if she had felt any hatred toward the Turks while she was pregnant. She said ‘No!’ I knew that answer was coming from her personality. So, I asked her if we could work with her Whole-Self. She agreed. When I invited her Whole-Self to take her back to 1974 to remember what was happening specifically for her, she realized that the husband of her first cousin who was to be her son’s godfather – had disappeared. She said that she had searched frantically for him and to her surprise recognized that she was feeling great hatred toward the Turks. She was able to tell her son what had happened to her during his gestation and the hatred she had not realized she was feeling. And she could share that her anger was actually a cover-up for her patterns of being helpless, hopeless and powerless during her pregnancy – and blaming the Turks. The son understood his hated was her hatred not his hatred and was able to start to release it. So, what we discovered is that prejudice and racial and ethnic hatred can be rooted in prenatal patterns. We are all seeking belonging. And, our identity comes from the individuation – the actual separation of self from the symbiosis with mother at birth beginning life.

Prebirth Memories of Slavery and Echoes of Colonialism

In 2010, there emerged major concern about human trafficking and human slavery especially of child labor and women, and men too, in the sex trade in the modern world. Consummate helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness of these slavery victims had not been recognized nor thought possible. We have pointed out before the impact of slavery on mass consciousness through the research of Sauci Bosner, a Whole-Self Psychology Therapist in Amsterdam. Bosner developed a project entitled Prebirth Memories of Slavery and Echoes of Colonialism. Whilefocused on Central and South America in which generations of victims are suffused and suppressed in anger and rage because of being helpless, hopeless and powerless the same principles apply worldwide to modern human trafficking and slavery. Bosner writes:

Such horror patterns have impregnated in stagnated identities of survivors, witnesses, victims, collaborators and perpetrators of atrocities. Irregardless of age, class, gender and race, all too often socio-economic and political interests of minorities have cast giant shadows of atrocities, devastation,  destruction and death on countless victims in the southern hemisphere: victims who were never offered options in their personal or professional evolution; victims who did not know that ‘NO!’ was also an answer; victims entangled in the human treadmill of helplessness, hopelessness and Power-lessness; victims who have transferred these patterns onto their children and their children’s children (Epigenetics). Without Consciousness, Without Choice, Without Hope, change and personal professional growth remain unrecognized birthrights and become destiny.

Shirley Ward, in her definitive study: Anger Related to Preconception, Conception and the Pre- and Perinatal Period in the International Journal of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Medicine (Fall 2006) based on the work of Lloyd de Mause states:

Violence is displayed in the form of war, riots, murder, torture, terrorism, and crime all of which seem to be escalating. Many of these forms of violence can only come from individuals collectively. War would be the greatest struggle between nations. National  Leaders may take us into war as they act out their own prenatal dynamics in gruesome ways – and others follow their own dynamics. From the field of experiential psychotherapy the answer to the cycles of violence, war, and death-rebirth is to stop the acting out, and relive these cycles of violence at their preconception and pre and perinatal origins – in order to find peace.

On an optimistic note from Shirley Ward:

Happy Conceptions Make Happy Babies, Make Happy People, Make a Happy World. … Conclusively, we live our lives according to the trauma or glory of our conceptions and our births.

Whole-Self Four Points of Victimness

Olga Gouni, makes four Whole-Self Psychology points about victimness. In the first person again, I have raised my survival mechanism of anger or retaliation, or having lost power. I am trapped in self-judgments and diminishing life decisions that place me in the position of the victim:

1. I oppose seeing the causative traumatic event and lock myself in my trauma trance pattern

2. I attract and get involved in life experiences that will keep proving to myself any diminishing self-judgments that I have made.

3. I create a future for myself based on the non-conscious diminishing decisions I have made, and, finally,

4. I contribute to the perpetuation of diminishing patterns in the world.

Attachment and Bonding

Attachment and Bonding are critical for healthy and holistic human development. When a newborn enters the world and healthily attaches to mother/father right after birth and continue during infancy and toddlerhood, the effects generate essential normal neurological development, as well as appropriate social skills and behaviors and emotional balance. Early attachment relationship creates health and trust – yielding lifelong, safe and appropriate and supporting relationships and success. Kelduyn R. Garland, also a pioneer in Reactive Attachment Disorder treatment describes:

Parent and child attachment is a biological and psychological need – rooted in thousands of years of evolution since the development of the mammalian brain. This bonding is critical for healthy emotional, social and physical development. The fraying of this attachment and bonding process spawns violent temperament, personality and behavior, and is a causal dynamic underlying Reactive Attachment Disorder. This fraying is a dynamic phenomena that knows no cultural, status or socio-economic boundary, and underlies the violence that is increasingly pervading societies throughout the world to global impact proportions.  

John Bowlby in the UK, pioneered Attachment and Bonding theory. Kate Moss offers a comprehensive definition and description in What is Attachment? on the Association for Treatment and Training in the Attachment of Children (ATTACh)  Website: www.attach.org:

Attachment is a reciprocal process by which an emotional connection develops between an infant and his/her primary caregiver. It influences the child’s physical, neurological, cognitive, and psychological development. It becomes the basis for development of basic trust or mistrust, and shapes how the child will relate to the world, learn, and form relationships throughout life. Healthy attachment occurs when the infant experiences a primary caregiver as consistently providing emotional essentials such as touch, movement, eye contact and smiles, in addition to the basic necessities such as food, shelter, and clothing.

Because it is so important as an increasing reproductive crisis, Whole-Self Psychology has discovered that when mother has no feelings or diminished loving communication in pregnancy, baby is born with no feelings. Subsequently, with no feelings of love and acceptance and a diminished ability to communicate, RAD children have no conscience. These are the children who in their anger and rage kill other children, their families or strangers. Research in Reactive Attachment Disorder shows that sibling murder can be a symptomatic behavior. RAD children can act out aberrant, even murderous behavior because they have no feelings or conscience.

Reactive Attachment Disorder

As mentioned above, every human being begins life in symbiosis with her or his mother by being psycho-spiritually, energetically attracted and attached to mother’s mind by her charged ideas and thoughts; and, to her emotional body by sharing her charged feelings and emotions – even before conception. When the enhancing symbiotic process is interrupted, Reactive Attachment Disorder can lock into the child (See Appendix 2) and as the news reports, because of unmitigating, unrelenting, explosive anger and rage develops into today’s dysfunctional, anti-social, disruptive, moralistic, psychopathic, even sociopathic children or adult sexual and/or murderous predators and terrorists. The simple beginning is, again as mentioned above when the symbiosis is ‘non-feeling’ resulting in a lack of any human love, compassion or empathy for the self or any other living creature – animal or human.

Two faces of Reactive Attachment

Whole-Self Psychology hypothesizes that Reactive Attachment has two faces: Reactive Attachment Disorder – RAD and Reactive Attachment Order – RAO. Both RAD and RAO babies lack healthful Attachment and Bonding patterns. Both have diminished emotional capacities of not having feelings. Both strongly develop their mental capacities (even when there can be apparent initial mental deficiency) to compensate for their diminished emotional capacities. RADs, without conscience, go into dyslogic and aberrant behaviors.RAOs, with conscience, go into logic and beneficent behaviors.

In RAD and RAO pregnancies the communication system described by Brekhman may not be functioning: first, in the mother, then, consequently, in baby. In RAD parents this non-communication can be because they are against having a baby and they may even try to abort what they judge to be ‘a thing’. In RAO parents this can be because even though not wanting a baby – say for medical reason – they are resigned and acceptive to the birth. As Thomas Verny has pointed out, some mothers and fathers are ‘managers’ and some are ‘parents’. The RAO motherwho feels no love towards her baby mentioned above is ‘a manager’. She can take care of the physical needs of ‘this baby’ but she has no emotional capacity to love ‘her baby’.

Terrible Tyrants and Diabolical Dictators

Sonne did monumental, research on the prebirth horrors of the 20^th Centuries most raging and destructive dictators. Sonne discovered how they all experienced horrendous gestations:

Tyrants such as Hitler, Franco, Stalin, Mussolini, Hussein, Milosevic, and bin Laden, have all demonstrated murderous hostility toward any one person or group who does not agree with them completely, or toward any group or person who has or aspires to have positions in society in which self and desire processes in social interactions are respected and affirmed, including those of different ethnic, racial or religious identifications and beliefs (symbolic “undeserving” siblings).

In his landmark paper On Tyrants As Abortion Survivors in the International Journal of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Medicine, Sonne advanced the thesis that these were all ‘unwanted’ men and all faced horrendous conditions during gestation and early childhood. He suggests the conscious or non-conscious themes of tyrants are:

“No one can have what I didn’t get, what is rightfully mine that has been taken away from me.” “I will psychologically or physically destroy these persons, and also anyone who gives or gave to them or supports them.” “Revenge is what I want more than anything else, and this is more important to me than being loved or cared for.” “I hate others, but I also loathe myself so much that if I die in seeking this, I will only have gratified my own wish for suicide.”

Sheila Crouch, Whole-Self Therapist in the UK, offers this perception of such men:

It is the weak male aspect that is causing the problems in society. Insecurity and no empowered male lead models lead men to invent their version which is influenced by the media as much as anything alongside hereditary patterns from cultures and religions. Apparently the real fear men have is that women can create another being and the closer we get to making men redundant the more their fears are realized. Belief systems create reality!  So the more women use sons as their insurance policies and shields believing they have no personal power the more we get these despotic types. The more we revere each being and see their gender as no more than having blond or brown hair the better!

Misogyny Towards Girls and Women

Horrendous abuse of girls and women in Afghanistan was at the top of the news at the beginning of 2011. Victimness of girls and women attacked for being female is tragic source of devastating helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness in the world. The main difference is that even though they are feeling helpless, hopeless and powerless girls and women must suffer in silence and are not allowed to express their anger because they are totally incapable of changing their situations for themselves or their families. So is this veiled anger being played out through their husbands and sons? We can only imagine the devastating prebirth patterns of religious zealots, who through distortion of religious texts, practice suppression, hatred and violence towards girls and women. The hypothesis may be explored that during pregnancies misogynist’s mothers might have been consumed with intolerance and hateful anger and rage. Anger and hate can be a prebirth inheritance? The anger and rage and rioting and pillage and murder in the name of the male god by religious extremists is overshadowing and blinding humanity.

What is often ignored is that nature has given us the key. Humanity is composed of two genders, with a few sub categories of genders, of approximately half female and half male. Is humanity disproportioned because of religious distortions? The cosmic irony is that while females are murdered at birth, it is possible that the mythical Armageddon could begin because there will not be enough women for men to mate with. In their landmark book Conscious Evolution the Stoffs trace misogyny to the suppression of the feminine goddess and the ascension of the male god and the dire consequences thus generated:

These actions or events have deprived millions of people, especially women, of the respect, opportunity and equality of life that all humans have as their birthright. They have deprived nations and the world of the brain power and nourishment these women could have provided each of us, given their opportunity. We have all suffered because countless generations of women have suffered. Males, raised in the spirit of misogyny have also suffered with their distorted vision of humankind and their distorted view of human relations and science. It is long overdue that our collective minds and hearts are opened to the plight of half of humanity – our mothers, wives, sisters and daughters. The suffering will continue until the problem, the world’s problem, yes, the problem of you and me, is made right. Justice is a strange phenomenon. It must be universal or it is not an accomplished fact.

Is the entrenched male god reveling in his crushing power or is there of vestige of the goddess in him appalled by man’s misogyny? The Stoffs conclude:

We now have a bold, reawakened understanding of divinity to embrace. As difficult as it is within the religious family comprised of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam to accept, the balancing of the masculine and feminine energies is the key to human maturity. We don’t believe we will ever achieve the return of partnership community, that of complete equality of the sexes in harmony which will provide the foundation to facilitate its blossoming, unless religion, as social and spiritual scaffolding, leads the way by formally recognizing such equality in public and private practice and by having the courage to firmly denounce past and present distortions. Only then can love flourish within humankind and a period of harmony flower. This is our future if we join together in making it come true.

Non-Violence: A key to Healing Anger

While we have been focusing on violence and victimness, it can be helpful to acknowledge a place for its opposite – ‘non-violence’ which can be a state of ‘resistive responsiveness’ without angry reactiveness. Non-violence can be a recognition and an acceptance of a pattern about myself that I know is true about myself without blaming and attacking someone else and their entrenched power. It can be a recognition or acknowledgement of myself and another when we disagree often in the face of the other person’s overwhelming power and force. Mahatma Gandhi in India is a leading worldwide advocate of non-violence in the face of overwhelming British power and authority during the RAJ. Martin Luther King, Jr. in the USA, described his vision of the promised land of freedom for descendants of African slaves.

While violence is an expression of masses of people, even in streaming together, non-violence can more often revolve around the individual self. It can be a state of recognition of who the other is, appreciation for his gifts to life, respect for his beingness and appreciation and even gratitude for who he is as a background for deep love to grow. Is this a possible source of the Stockholm Syndrome where the victim supports her or his captor? Safety of the individual self is a prerequisite for anything healthy to come and the authentic interest and attention turned to the self or other so that, in the first person, I can recognize who I am and who the other is. When this self lacks conviction, the energy of fear seeps into me resulting in unsatisfied primary need to stand up, or lie down, in non-resistance to my commitment to a high human idea(l) that is at stake. When I am resisting my helplessness hopelessness and powerlessness my high ideal crumbles into an often futile behavior of anger and most likely perpetuates those patterns imprinted with violent reaction from the oppressor towards me. When non-violence has been mastered and brought into patient practice, violence can be healed on both sides of the anger divide.

For our Postscript about belonging and individuation, we turn again to final thoughts from Dr. Wayne Guthrie:

The emotional cloud of distrust and disturbance that surrounds the planet, brought forth and created by the emotions and the misuse of those emotions by man, is that which divides the world at this time. It takes then, men and women with great vision to move beyond that which holds them bound to the emotional world, to begin to bring about a release to this cloud that surely holds man in bondage. It is important that one be free, not of emotions, because that is an integral part of their growth process of the human being upon the earth, but to maintain a balance within the emotional structure. It is that which you have come to master and what you have come to teach.

Having begun with President Barak Obama’s words, we offer his closing words about the 9 year old little beam of light shot and killed in Tucson, Arizona:

That’s what I believe, in part because that’s what a child like Christina Taylor Green believed. Imagine: here was a young girl who was just becoming aware of our democracy; just beginning to understand the obligations of citizenship; just starting to glimpse the fact that someday she too might play a part in shaping her nation’s future. She had been elected to her student council; she saw public service as something exciting, something hopeful. She was off to meet her congresswoman, someone she was sure was good and important and might be a role model. She saw all this through the eyes of a child, undimmed by the cynicism or vitriol that we adults all too often just take for granted.

I want us to live up to her expectations. I want our democracy to be as good as she imagined it. All of us – we should do everything we can to make sure this country lives up to our children’s expectations.

Christina was given to us on September 11th, 2001, one of 50 babies born that day to be pictured in a book called “Faces of Hope.”  On either side of her photo in that book were simple wishes for a child’s life. “I hope you help those in need,” read one. “I hope you know all of the words to the National Anthem and sing it with your hand over your heart. I hope you jump in rain puddles.”

If there are rain puddles in heaven, Christina is jumping in them today. And here on Earth, we place our hands over our hearts, and commit ourselves as Americans to forging a country that is forever worthy of her gentle, happy spirit.

 ©2010

Information on the Whole-Self model is available on www.Whole-Self.info and www.Whole-Self.co.uk , in Greece – www.cosmoanelixis.gr

Appendix 1:

Copyrighted Whole-Self Prebirth Analysis Matrix@2008 Question and Meaning of Specific Question #8:

Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the egg’s instant emotional reactions as she is surrounded and engulfed by the surviving sperm (plural) trying to enter her.

Please allow your Whole-Self to let you experience the sperm’s instant emotional reactions as he is trying to enter her.

Some 40 years ago, through Question #8), we discovered and taught that sexual preference and attraction is locked in before birth – even before conception!

In Gay Men, could it be that I am locked in my egg/female/receiver? – that my spermatozoid was not attracted to the egg?  – that my spermatozoid felt overwhelmed or rejected by the egg? – that my spermatozoid felt an obligation and/or a lack of choice? In Lesbian Women, could it be that I am locked in my sperm/male/initiator? – that my egg might be terrorized by the sperm? – that the egg was disappointed by the sperm? – that the egg felt an obligation and/or a lack of choice? Just recognizing this information about my innate (born with) gender and sexual patterns often releases feelings of fear, guilt or diminishing self-judgments or decisions against myself. If I have felt uncomfortable about my relationship or sexual feelings or preferences, that is, intimate feelings towards others of my own gender, I can now recognize that these feelings or patterns are not bad or wrong, sinful, evil or sick but actually existed even before I was conceived. In human gender I am simply another aspect of a normal sexual being.

Appendix 2:

Some Reactive Attachment Disorder Parameters

The following lists are some diminishing patterns experienced by mother, and through her charged emotional and mental reactions, by baby during pregnancy and by baby after birth.

1)     Mother’s sudden and/or traumatic separation from loved ones and for baby primary caretaker through illness, hospitalization or death.

2)   Physical, mental, emotional, or sexual abuse pre or perinatally.

3)   Neglect of her needs and/or abandonment of mother during pregnancy and by baby after birth.

4)   Illness with unrelenting pain in both mother and baby.

5)   Frequent moves and/or temporary foster family placements.

After birth RAD children can exhibit ‘child from hell’ patterns:

1)  Hyper alertness to counter terrors of destruction and survival reactiveness.

2)  Refusal to make or hold eye contact

3)  False ‘charming’ acting out.

4)  Inappropriate ‘feel goods’ with strangers.

5)  Inappropriately demanding and clinging with strangers.

6)  Revenge by refusal to receive or give affection or respect with parents or caregivers.

7)  Continuous talking and repeated annoying stupid questions.

8)  Poor peer contacts. No friends.

9)  Extreme overt and/or sneaky control patterns.

 Because of neurological deficiencies RAD Children

1)  Do not have conscience nor fear consequences for bad actions.

2)  Do not perceive consequences for wrong actions.

3)  Can have learning disabilities and developmental delays.

4)  Can have critical inability to control reactive impulses.

5)  Can  have hyperactive behavior.

Because of disturbed emotional development RAD Children can display:

1)  Infantile fear and outrageous rage.

2)  Incoherent and/or confusing speech patterns. The speech center seems to be miswired.

3)   Aberrant patterns around food and feces.

4)   Sneaky stealing of objects and hoarding of food.

5)   Stupid crazy lying.

6)   Harming self and others, or property.

7)   Abusing, torturing and killing helpless animals.

8)   A strong attraction to fire, blood, and gore including Video Games.

References:

Analysis Matrix© Question #8, (see Appendix)

BBC TV News 1 Nov. 2010 Tea Party Movement: This World

BBC World Service News Radio 23 Nov 2010 David in Bolivia

Brekhman Grigori Phenomenon of Violence

Bosner Prebirth Memories of Slavery and Echoes of Colonialism.

Bowlby John Attachment and Bonding theory

Crouch, Sheila 100111 Personal Communication

Furedi Frank Culture of Fear

Fedor-Freybergh Sheldon and Smith, Barbara Conscious Evolution: The Dance of Intuition and Intellect American Heritage Dictionary

Findeisen Barbara (2010) Personal Communication

Garland, Kelduyn R Whole-Self Psychology in the Whole-Self Prebirth Conscious Evolution, 2010,

Gouni, Olga (2005) Prebirth Psychology in Action Presented at the 16^th International Congress of the ISPPM ‘The Anthropology and Psychology of Pregnancy and Birth’ Heidelberg, Germany 2-5 June

Obamacare’ – a ‘Socialist Virus’

Moliterno Suely Moments Before Conception

Rich, Frank in a New York Times op-ed‘

Rodham-Clinton, Hilary It Takes a Village: And Other Lessons Children Teach Us

Sonne, J. C. (1994 a)  The relevance of the dread of being aborted to models of therapy and models of the mind. Part I: Case examples. IJPPPM, 6(1): 67-86. (Republished 1995, Pre- and  Perinatal Psychology Journal, 9(3):195-219)

Sonne, J. C. (1994 b)  The relevance of the dread of being aborted to models of therapy and models of the mind. Part II: Mentation and communication in the unborn. IJPPPM, 6(2): 247-275. (Republished in 1995, Pre- and Perinatal Psychology Journal, 9(4): 257-294).

Sonne, J. C. (1996 b)  Interpreting the dread of being aborted in therapy. The International Journal of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Medicine, 8(3): 317- 339. (Republished in 1997,  Pre-and  Perinatal Psychology Journal, 11(4): 185- 214.)

Sonne, J.C. (1998 b) The dynamics of dehumanization. Paper presented June 5 at the 21^st  Annual Convention of The International Psychohistorical Association. New York City, June 3-5.

Sonne, J.C. (2000b) Abortion survivors at Columbine. Journal of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Health, 15(1),Fall 2000: 3-22.

Sonne, J. C. (2002) The Varying Behaviors of Fathers in the Prenatal Experience of the Unborn: Protecting, Loving and “Welcoming with Arms Wide Open,” vs. Ignoring, Unloving, Competitive, Abusive, Abortion-Minded or Aborting  IJPPPM, 14 (1-2) : 33-52.

Sonne, J. C. (2002) On Tyrant Abortion Survivors Aborting  IJPPPM15 (3-4) : 261-276.

Ward Shirley Anger Related to Preconception, Conception and the Pre- and Perinatal Period in the International Journal of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Medicine (Fall 2006)

Westermann, Sigrid Whole-Self Co-Director in Hamburg, Germany

Website: www.attach.org: