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  • Inside Out
  • Issue 71: Autumn 2013
  • Nobody Told Me

Nobody Told Me

Nobody Told Me
(A Personal Cosmology)
 
When I was growing up
I was told many things
That have helped me to
Make my way in the world.
 
I was told stories about the
Time of my birth
And of my lineage
The generations that went before me.
 
I was told things about the earth
How it came to be
How nature works
Its place in the universe.
I was told about right and wrong
Love and hate
Rights and responsiblities
Life and death.
 
And it has all helped me
To make my way…..
 
But
 
Nobody told me that my
Biological birth was only that
And that it simply created the arena
In which the birth of my Self would unfold.
 
Nobody told me that while the
Duration of my biological birth
Could be measured in hours
The duration of the birth of my Self
Would be measured in lifetimes.
 
Nobody told me that
In birthing my Self
I would be the one giving birth
And the one being born – both.
 
Nobody told me that the transition between
Each stage of my development
Childhood-Adolescence-Adulthood-Old Age
Would be a contraction
That would propel me further
Along the birth-canal of my life.
 
And that the circumstances
And events of my life
Are contractions also
Each creating the next necessary push.
 
Nobody told me that in order to
Birth my Self
I would have to meet myself
All of myself
My darkness and my light.
 
And that the birth of my Self
Is only one side of the coin
The other side being what feels like
The death of myself.
 
Nobody told me that the
Birth of my Self is essential
If humankind is to
Birth its Self.
And that the birth of
The Self of humankind is essential
If all of creation is to
Birth its Self.
 
Nobody told me that the
Whole of creation must wait….
And wait……
Until I eventually birth my Self.
 
Nobody told me!
 
Well
I say nobody told me
 
But
 
There have been a few
Wide-eyed visionaries
Along the way
Who have whispered it.
 
And that has been enough.

Pauline Emerson

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